The Real Life Cooking Strategy Guide Blog: USA – Fictional Futuristic Post-Apocalyptic Grand Canyon Area; Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner

Breakfast
Drinkable Yogurt or Kefir
Fried Cola (Post-apocalyptic style)
Scrambled Eggs
Preparation Time: 35 Minutes
No marinating needed.
If you play the video game where Fried Cola is on the menu, and you've never tasted Fried Cola, let it be known that most people haven't tasted Fried Cola. Its sold at carnivals in Pennsylvania, and some other seasonal carnivals around the US. Can't buy it at Wal-mart, so if you want to know how it taste in real life, you'll have to cook it yourself, or get someone in your house to cook it for you.

Picture of Pancakes courtesy of Brandon Martin-Anderson, Fried Cola is Cola Pancakes.

Ingredients and Shopping List:
1 glass of drinkable yogurt, kefir, or plain yogurt mixed 50/50 with water
Batter:
1 cup of Pancake Mix
1/4 cup of Cola Syrup (Can be ordered from the Walmart pharmacy. Comes in about 1 day. Don't have to be above 18 years of age to order. Just call or stop by the pharmacy and ask them to order it for you. Cost about 2.50 or so for a 4 ounce bottle).
1/2 cup of Cola, Zevia, regular, sugar-free, or sugar-free/caffeine-free
For Frying:
1/2 cup of Canola Oil
Syrup:
¼ cup of Pancake Syrup
¼ cup of Cola Syrup
¼ cup of Dried Cherries or Dried Fruit of Any Kind (optional)
Eggs:
2 Raw Eggs or Equal Amount of Egg Substitute
1/4 cup of Canola Oil

Equipment:
Skillet (preferably not non-stick. If non-stick you will have to get someone to show you how to cook with non-stick cookware) and stove top
1 Medium mixing bowl for the pancake mix
1 Spatula
1 Ladle
1 Spoon for stirring scrambled eggs while cooking
1 Jar for the scrambled eggs

Instructions:
Pour the ½ cup of canola oil into the skillet. Turn the heat to medium. Wait until 15 minutes until the skillet is really hot, but not quite smoking. If its smoking its too hot, turn it down and let it cook a bit. While you are waiting for the oil to heat up, mix the ½ cup of Coke or cola, plus the ¼ cup of cola syrup into pancake mix. Mix until smooth.

Pour a little pancake-sized disk of batter in the middle of the hot skillet. Wait until little bubbles start to harden in the pancake, and the edges start to look golden brown. Carefully hold the handle of the skillet, while you flip the pancake. It will be a little gooey and sticky, but with a little practice you can flip the whole pancake at one time. Wait for about one minute after flipping. Take the pancake off and put it on a plate, keep doing this until all the batter is gone. Stack the pancakes on top of one another, like a tower of pancakes. Add another ½ cup of canola oil, if the oil runs out.

While the pancakes are cooking. Mix the syrup. ¼ cup of pancake syrup, and ¼ cup of cola syrup. Add the optional fruit.

While the pancakes are cooking mix the yogurt drink.

When the last pancake is cooking, break the raw eggs, and put them into a jar. Try not to get any shells into the jar. Put the lid on the jar. Shake the jar. Pour ¼ cup of canola oil into the skillet. Pour the eggs into the skillet. Stir the eggs a little with the spoon. When they are done, take them out and put them on the plate to.

Pour the syrup mix onto the pancakes.

Get the kefir, or drinkable yogurt, or make the drinkable yogurt (if there wasn't any at your store), while waiting for the pancakes to cook.

To make drinkable yogurt, mix 50/50 water and yogurt of any kind. Pour the water in the glass first. Then pour in the yogurt and mix very well with a fork.

Eat.

Note: The brain food in this meal is the drinkable yogurt.

Note: Zevia is the best kind of soda pop for the brain because it is made with erythritol and stevia.

Note: Cola syrup doesn't come in a sugar-free or caffeine-free version.

Note: Cola syrup is sold at the pharmacy because it is a non-FDA sanctioned medicine for upset stomach.

Note: Whole grain pancake mix is healthier than pancake mix made from white flour.

Note: White sugar simply doesn't allow the brain to perform at optimal levels. For one reason, it leeches essential B Vitamins from the body in order to be digested. The body need B Vitamins in order to digest sugar, so when sugar enters the body without the B Vitamins attatched (and they would be attatched if they were in their natural sugar cane state), the body must rob its B Vitamin reserves in order to digest that sugar. If the reserves are high, it doesn't affect the brain as much, but if they are low, it affects the entire nervous system becuase B Vitamins are utilized heavily by all aspects of the nervous system including the brain. Stevia doesn't do this to the brain, neither does natural sugar cane.

Picture of Fried Coke Made by Experienced Chef. Photo courtesy of Stephen Witherden.
Fried Coke can also be served like a funnel cake.

Picture of Funnel Cake courtesy of Lorax.

Lunch
Water
Hard Tack
Dried Veggie Trail Mix
Preparation Time: For most people, 2 Hours or Longer
No marinating needed.
Hard tack aka Sea Biscuit is just hard crackers, made to last a long time, in difficult conditions, like little or no refrigeration etc... It's sailor's rations. Again, can't buy it at Wal-mart. If you live in Alaska or Hawaii, they are easy to buy. And other people around the US can buy them at stores that carry The Diamond Bakery's “Saloon Pilot Crackers" which is probably not carried at your Walmart. So if Walmart is the only store in your town, and you want to know how it tastes, you'll have to bake it yourself, or get someone you know to bake it for you.

The purpose of hard tack is not that it will taste good, not that it will be easy to chew, not even that it will be healthy, prevent scurvy, or help you be a better gamer; but that it will not spoil for a long time, and you can eat it instead of starving.

Picture of Hard Tack courtesy of Samuel Mellert.

Ingredients and Shopping List:
Hard Tack--
2 cups of White Flour
¾ cup of Water
1 tablespoon of Shortening

Dried Veggie Trail Mix--
1 can of Nuts of any Kind
1 cup of Shelled Sunflower Seeds
1 cup of Dried Any Kind of Squash Seeds like Pumpkin Seeds
1 cup of Sesame Seeds
1 cup of Dried Peas
1 cup of Dried Olives (you can use wet olives if you don't really need to store the veggie trail mix, since dried olives are not sold at Wal-mart)
½ cup of Chia Seeds or Freshly Ground Flax Seeds (optional since only available at some health food stores)
1 package of Wakami (a sea weed available at Walmart in the Asian Food section as sushi wraps)

Equipment:
Mixing bowl and spoon for hard tack
Mixing bowl and zip lock bags for veggie trail mix
Cookie sheet and oven

Instructions:
If you can buy the hard tack, just buy it.
If you can't buy it, pre-heat the oven to 400 Degrees. Mix the ingredients. They should mix to a cookie dough consistency. Make the dough into a big ball. Put the ball into the middle of the cookie sheet. Press the dough onto the cookie sheet, and keep thinning it out until its about ¼ inch thick all over the cookie sheet. You can roll it with a rolling pin if you like.

Bake for 1 ½ hours. Take out of the oven. Cut into 3 inch by 3 inch squares. Poke 4 sets of 4 holes with a fork. Flip to the other side. Put back into the oven. Bake for another ½ and hour.

While the hard tack is baking, fix the veggie trail mix. Mix the nuts, dried seeds, dried peas, dried olives, and sea weed in a bowl. Put it in zip log bags.

Take out of oven. Cool. Wrap and store in a cool dry place.

You can drink water with this emergency meal (or just a hiking meal for the trail mix).

Eat during a gaming or real emergency.

Note: The brain foods in this meal are olives, sesame seeds, freshly ground flax seeds, and chia seeds.

Note: For really serious hard tack you'll have to bake it again at 250 Degrees to completely dry out any moisture that might cause it to spoil, especially if you live in a humid area.

Note: A fantastic brain super food is Tecuitlat, (Aztec for rock excrement), known in English as spirulina. It can be used to improve your brain speed and stamina after a long day of gaming (or studying). It is a micro-sea weed aka micro-algae that grows naturally in Lake Texoco of Mexico. It was used like hard tack by the Aztec warriors, but it is far superior nutritionally to hard tack, as it can maintain muscles, heal wounds, and prevent scurvy. But apparently, like hard tack, it tastes awful. Nutritionally it is more like non-perishable meat fortified with Vitamin C; even though its just a humble water plant. The Aztec carried it around in cakes. Today, in the US, spirulina cakes are not available at Walmart, and even health food stores only carry it in pills or powder. It can't even be bought at a hunting/survival supply store in cakes. In the US, it is most often used to make smoothies. It can be bought in cakes in Ndjemena , Chad, Africa. It grows naturally in at Lake Chad, near there.

Picture of Aztec Drawings of Making Tecuitlat or Spirulina Cakes

Picture of Modern-day Spirulina Pills from Health Food Store.

Dinner
Local Wild Tea
Grilled Goat Bobs
Preparation Time: 15 - 30 Minutes
Marinating not required, but healthier.

Picture of Tomato and Marinated Chicken Kabobs on Hot Coals courtesy of Aali451.

Wild sage leaves, or wild mint leaves, or wild leaves from a local plant that makes tea
Chunks of any Kind of Lean Meat (if its not goat meat, we'll just pretend it's goat meat)
Chunks of Onions for cooking
Chunks of Green Bell Peppers for cooking
Red bell peppers for eating raw
Red and Green Hot Peppers for eating raw (eating them raw is optional)
Shiitake Mushrooms (available at Walmart in cans, fresh at other grocers)
Kelp aka Kombu, a sea weed, or sea veggie (optional since it probably can't be bought at Walmart, but only health food stores)

Equipment:
Enough Wooden Shish Kabob Skewered or Chop Sticks to stick the meat and veggies on
Microwave or Cooking Fire
Wax paper for covering microwaving kabobs, if microwaving

Instructions:
Pick leaves for tea. If you don't know what leaves to pick, please don't. Many poison wild foods can very easily be mistaken for safe wild foods by the unknowing eye. Just make tea out of some of the shiitake mushrooms.

Chop up the onions and green bell peppers into chunks. Pull the stem off of the mushrooms and set aside for making into tea. Shiitake mushroom stems are kind tough for eating, but they are good for making tea. Throw them away if you are not using them for making tea. Stick one chunk of meat on the skewer or chop stick, follow it by a chunk of onion, and then a chunk of green pepper, then a chunk of mushroom.

Keep doing this until all the skewers or chop sticks are full.
Microwave or cook over fire the filled skewered until done (cover with wax paper and cook about 10 - 15 minutes in microwave or 30 minutes over the fire, depending on how big the chucks are. Bigger chunks take longer to cook.

While the meat and veggies are cooking start fixing the tea.
Wash off the picked leaves, including washing off all of the bugs.
Put leaves in a coffee cup full of water and microwave for 2-3 minutes.
If making shiitake tea, put the mushroom stems into a cup full of water and microwave for 2-3 minutes.

Then the meat and veggies are almost finished cooking put, raw peppers and kelp on the plate.
Take the skewers or chopsticks out of the heat and put them on the plate.
Get the tea.

Eat.

Note: The brain food in this meal is shiitake mushrooms and kelp and lean meat.

Note: In real life shiitake mushrooms are a home remedy for food poisoning.

Picture of Shiitake Mushrooms Growing in the Wild.

Picture of Bell Peppers courtesy of Luke Viatour at www.lucnix.be

Note: In real life, raw red bell peppers and raw red and green hot peppers are the highest foods in the world in Vitamin C. Eating foods high in Vitamin C helps to ward off the effects of rough living, and helps to improve the radiation poisoning fighting effectiveness of shiitake mushrooms. Cooking the red peppers reduces the hotness, but it also reduces the nonavailability of the Vitamin C.

Picture of Red Peppers in Texas Sorted According to Hotness as Measured courtesy of the Scoville Heat Units Hotness Measuring Scale or SHU's.

Note: In real life, kelp helps prevent thyroid cancer as the result of radiation poisoning.

************************************************************************

For more information about this icon see How this Cookbook Blog Works or see the June 14, 2011 Entry, Hello.